What I have
I pulled my hair up and thought about the things I had. My mind was completely as ease. I had just awoken from dozing in my lover's bed while reading "Rose Madder" for like the 50th time. "Rose Madder" always made me feel extra grateful about my life and every moment passing.
In the place where I live it's magical. People do what they say they will. No one has an alternate agenda. You'll rarely see a person choose an addiction over someone they care about. And people do. Care that is. Genuine interest goes into their every question, soft words of advice, congratulations, or sorrow. There is little blindness at things that are hard to look at. Someone is always opening the door for you. Little old ladies stop any random stranger to ask for directions. When someone decides to build their home by hand someone else is there to help it along.
So where was I going. Oh yes, gratefulness. I don't have everything I want but I have everything I need, for now. My hair is pulled back tall and only a minimum of the many layers is able to wrench itself free from the band's grasp. I have my lover who makes me feel like a magnificent being every day. I have my job where my boss often gives me words of thankfulness for my presence. I have the many organizations I participate in, help run even. I have my family. They bring me coffee in the morning and voice their love, concern, and pride in me so often I'll never forget it. I have a beautiful little struggling elephant eared plant that I worry over daily in hopes that it will increase likelihood of it surving my black thumb. I have a path to a future that will bring me the freedom I need to survive, to exist, to have all the small stupid things that make me eager to start the day so I can find them. Soon I'll have a new name and a home to call my own.
In reality these things are not many when compared to my long years of work, struggle, torture, loyalty and dedication. But right now there is not a single other thing that I ache for. My life is full.
posted by The Getup Kid @ 5:07 PM
1 Comments:
Good to see that you have posted again and that things are well. Your post reminded me of the following story that a friend sent to me.
A man found a cocoon of a butterfly
One day a small opening appeared
He sat and watched the butterfly for several hours
It struggled to force its body through that little hole
Then it seemed to stop making any progress
It appeared as if it had gotten as far as it could
And it could go no farther.
So the man decided to help the butterfly
He took a pair of scissors and snipped off
The remaining bit of the cocoon.
The butterfly then emerged easily, BUT,
It had a swollen body and small, shriveled wings
He continued to watch the butterfly
He expected that, at any moment, the wings would enlarge
And the body would contract
Neither happened!
In fact, the butterfly spent the rest of its life crawling
Around with a swollen body and shriveled wings.
It was never able to fly.
The man acted with well-intentioned kindness
But he didn't understand the consequences.
The restricting cocoon and the struggle required to get
Through the tiny opening, were nature's way of forcing fluid
From the body of the butterfly once it achieved it's freedom
From the cocoon.
Sometimes struggles are exactly what we need in our life.
If nature allowed us to go through life without any
Obstacles, it would cripple us.
We would not be as strong as we could have been
And we could never fly
Have a great day, great life, and struggle a little.
Then fly!
Hoped you liked it; be well and Karma to you.
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